Friday, April 12, 2013

My Turkey Hunt

Facebook excerpt last night : 
I know I must have had too much sugar tonight because I felt good and then I heard myself say...hey Shannon, I want to go hunting with you in the morning....oh my...what have I done? pray for,, me...well, I think we will both need it...sigh
Facebook excerpt this morning:
Well, I'M UP.....shhhh (whispering)....I mean...I'm up...Shannon told me to use my whisper voice (like I'm a two year old...sheesh) I've got my ghilli suit on and Shannon's boots that are 3 sizes too big for me. I like this ghilli can't tell whether it's my jiggly parts or the ghilli part....:).....I'm drinking coffee (which may not be good for later) and Shannon just asked "do you have on makeup?"......yes, yes I do.....only for the paramedics when they have to come pick me up after having a heart attack climbing hills and trying "not to breathe so hard" WHAT? NO, I'M NOT ON FACEBOOK....shhhh..don't tell Shannon......wish me luck...:)

Facebook excerpt:
Well....I've made us late...I knew I shouldn't have had that coffee...:(
And we are back
So after we leave this morning to go turkey hunting.....we didn't make it very far before an argument broke out
over the temperature inside the hot.....he not....he said "Todd, my normal hunting partner, never
bothers the temp. controls.".....and I said...."Well I ain't Todd and I ain't normal...:)"......all I heard was mumble,

mumble....It wasn't so bad because we would stop and he... would listen for a turkey and I only once almost had
a panic attack....because he tightened my boot strings so tight and my ankle started itching and I couldn't even
get a finger in there to scratch I waited...and I bit my lip....and I waited...and I squirmed......and I finally
looked like a dog, scratching one boot with the other boot as hard as I could......and I got the evil eye then.....and
the next time he got out he handed me the face cover thingie and told me to get I tried it on.....several
different ways...(see photos)...
Does it go this way?
Then what is this black band for?
This way? much face showing
Maybe the hole goes in the back?  just net?
I'm cool...
thumbs up for turkey hunters......told you I was bored....
.I still don't know how it goes.....
Hello it time to go home now?
as time wore on I started getting verrrry sleeepy....
and then I started praying that he wouldn't hear a turkey (don't tell Shannon) and then the next time he got back
in the truck I told him I thought I had a kidney infection....turns out that my drawstring on my pants was just too tight...
so needless to say...we did not kill a turkey.....I'm sure it was MY fault......I may not get to go again.......darn....:)


Theresa said...

You are TOOOO hilarious!!

Kidney infection...hahaha!! I am a fellow hypochondriac. When I die I want the following written on my tombstone "I told you I was sick!"

Thanks for the laugh.

Lisa Tucker said...

I'm so glad you get my humor family does not think I am funny...:) thanks for commenting...:)

My Maine Blog said... are a HOOT!!!!!You should definitely look into becoming a stand up comedian...I can actually picture you up on stage telling this story...your family may not think you are funny but I bet they'd change their minds once you started raking in the money and just think of the lives you'd impact...You are my daily dose of laughter and you always make me laugh out loud. It's time you packed up your travelin' clothes and went on the road with your act. On another note I'm trying to scrape up enough money to take a trip to Nashville to see my daughter next month when she does one of her shows....wouldn't it be great if you could be her opening act and we could meet in person. I know...I really have a vivid imagination...but you have to admit that would be cool. I would be your biggest FAN and laughing the loudest. I love you like a daughter Lisa Tucker...have a great weekend. Hugs

Lisa Tucker said...

Well you did it this time My Sweet made me cry. You are the sweetest thing ever! Love you right back! And your daughter.....aren't you so proud! She is wonderful and I'm so glad she is doing good! Did she get that beautiful voice from you? Even if she didn't get her voice from you she has to be awesome because she is yours...:)))) love and hugs!

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness, you had my husband and I rolling with laughter. I told him this was my proof to why I should not go hunting with him;-)

blessings, jill and the nature dude