Crazy Chicken Lady Goes On A Cruise!

 

 

CRAZY CHICKEN LADY GOES ON A CRUISE

PART ONE

 

Well let's start a few days before leaving....you know you got to get them thar feet fixed.

 

Cue giant cheese grater.....uggg.

 

 

It was the best I could do,

 

 I tried to lose 60 pounds in 3 days

 

but Little Debbie totally vetoed that!

 

 

And away we gooooo!!!!

 

Did I tell you that I was invited to go with this beautiful bunch of ladies?

 

My first and only cruise before this was a disaster.

 

We didn't get to do any excursions due to weather, I was a senior chaperone and

 

I was so claustrophobic in our little tiny room in the bowel of the ship

 

that I slept on the top deck in a pool chair!

 

Needless to say I turned down every cruise I was ever invited on.

 

But these ladies persisted and I knew if I couldn't have a good time with them then

 

I was hopeless.

 

 

Bon Voyage New Orleans!

 

Okay...let's get down to business...

 

the FOOD!!!

 

 

I was very impressed and excited about ice cream any time I wanted...:) and pizza!

 

But I really need to talk to them about portion size.....do you see that itty bitty

 

bowl that's empty.....well it had mac and cheese in it and I had to order another one...

 

I was like..."I need another shot of mac and cheese please"........yes...

 

yes I did.

 

And by the end of the cruise the waiters would just automatically bring me the

 

warm chocolate melting cake (whether it was on the menu or not).

 

It may have had something to do with my own melt down when I didn't see it on the menu..:)

 

And while I'm talking about our waiters......they were so much fun!!!

 

 

My group of ladies are mostly from Louisiana and you know these ladies know how to party.

 

They brought different "accessories" for each night at dinner.

 

This night they brought us all glow necklaces and they gave the waiters these sunglasses...:)

 

Needless to say we were the loudest table in the dining room.

 

 

They even surprised me with a chicken (it may really be a duck) but it brought many giggles.

 

We were rock'n but not just because we are THAT cool but because the entire trip

 

this boat was rocking and rolling....................a...........................lot!!!

 

Dinner nights people were dropping like flies....headed back to their rooms....unable to eat.

 

GASP!  UNABLE TO EAT?!!

 

THIS GIRL'S BRAIN WON'T EVEN COMPREHEND THAT!

 

I warned my friends....I really did......you see no matter what I do or where I go there is always the

 

"Lisa factor".

 

You guys know this if you read my blog.

 

Like this for example...

http://smile99999.blogspot.com/2014/10/a-letter-from-my-future-self.html

 

or this

 

http://smile99999.blogspot.com/2013/11/sothis-happened.html

 

So the rest of the trip whenever we ran into "snags" they just chalked it up to the

 

"Lisa factor".

 

Eh....I'm used to it....:)

 

 

My beautiful group at dinner.

 

I tried to get many shots of our cruise sunrises and sunsets.

 

 

So maybe I slept in a little late this morning...:)

 

 

Ahhhhh....so much beauty.

 

Another night dining....check out our scarves...our LA friends once again.

 

Why didn't I think to bring them something?

 

Hmmmm...but what?  A chicken feather?

 

Waaaa....my stuff is just not cool...:(

 

 

Did I tell you that they have this really cool channel in your room that you can see how far you have

 

been and all sorts of other information?

 

It was a little reassuring to me....I don't know why.......like I thought I would know which

 

direction to swim or something if we sank...haha.

 

One day I almost bought some kid's arm floaties just to keep in my purse.....shhhh...

 

don't tell the others.......I was not going to share.....;)

 

Okay....enough of that....back to the trip.

 

First stop is Cozumel!!

 

Let me tell you...these cruise lines have everything figured out!

 

They herd you out like cattle....before you can even think..one person jostles you in front of the

 

Cozumel sign and there is a photographer

 

saying" luke theese way...say sheeeeese!"

 

Of course these photos are all available for sale when you get back on the ship

 

This is part of the reason that the week AFTER you are home from your trip you have

 

to time your life perfectly in order to beat your husband to the mailbox...

 

you know you do that walk/run thing to get the mail before him....and he asks "what's your hurry?" and you

 

are like "haha....I don't know what you mean?...oh...my jogging.....just trying to

 

get in shape for you honey!!"

 

And that's when you realize that your "free trip" that you paid for in advance has cost you $700.00

 

more!!!

 

The visa simply states......excursions, drinks, photos, spa, shirts, chicken toy, jade dolphin, blah blah blah.

 

It's like that show "Deal or No Deal".  Where the employee at Hot Dog Hut who was going to make

 

$30.00 that day at work suddenly turns down $175,000 because they are caught up in the frenzy of

 

the game. Blam!!  NO DEAL!

 

That was me!!

 

Sure I NEED a jade dolphin....pshhh....I have to have a jade dolphin.....

 

What...the spa costs $295?.....well I AM on vacation.....book me!!

 

Who could possibly turn down a chicken toy from Mexico?????  Not meeeee!!

 

 

hahahaha....don't you love my friend's bathing suit cover up...:)

 

We are off the ship and headed to this place!

 

 

Which was a wonderful excursion that we all highly recommend!!

 

 

SWIM WITH THE DOLPHINS!!!

 

 

 We got to kiss them and pet them and swim with them.

 

You could tell that the dolphins were very loved and very well taken care of.

 

There were all these different pools that were right next to the Caribbean Sea.

 

 

 

We all loved it!!

 

I think the dolphin loved us too...:)

 

He was whispering  "you've got chicken breath."

 

 

After this we just walked around the area and saw some of the sights.

 

There were always great photo opportunities.

 

I walked back to the ship before the others in order to book a wonderful spa massage...ahhhhh.

 

Talk about 60 minutes in heaven. 

 

(I'm not even going to talk about how much it cost)

 

(We will worry about that later...note to self.....take up jogging)

 

And then we met in our dining room for dinner.

 

Formal night.

 

This is my friend who got all of us together for the cruise and her beautiful daughters and daughter in law.

 

Aren't they gorgeous?!!!

 

They were not allowed near me in the pool or any bathing suit function...:)

 

and F.Y.I....they all have children....wow.

 

 

And have you ever heard of "here's your sign?"

 

well I found mine

 

 



And this may be a good stopping point for this post.

 

Stay tuned for part two of the cruise.

 

We are going to Progresso!!!

 

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