Well I was going to share with y'all some pretty photos of the scenery that I got to see on my way to
move college kid home (for the final time) from Tuscaloosa.
But I am in a really crappy mood today and instead of saying beautiful things about life
and the beauty of nature this is what you get.
This is a beautiful photo of blue skies, green grass and a dead tree......yep just like life.
stupid dead tree...
Oh and here I am....dead tree and broken limb....
What is wrong with me?
I don't know.....I wasn't prepared for the emotions of moving college kid for the last time.
And I didn't move him home... he went to live with his brother...which is right down the road so
I don't know why I'm sad about this.
I would be twice as sad if he stayed in college forever.... so what do I want?
I don't like change.
Are you like that?
Any big change just shakes me up.
And change is ALL that we have had lately.
(it's a good thing you don't have sound or you would here a woman blowing her horn at me
because I was drifting into her lane while taking this photo.......I know.....shame on me.)
But I was desperate to get this photo for the LAST time.....which is so stupid....it's not like I'm never
going to Tuscaloosa again!
What is wrong with me?
This is what you want for your children.
To grow up and be normal, healthy adults that can thrive on their own.
But part of me is thinking "they are growing up and thriving on their own!!!....without.......me..:(
(thriving may be stretching it....college kid still needs a job...Masters Degree in Sports Management in case you have connections with a college or Pro team that needs to hire someone..:)
Why are my insides churning and my heart aching?
And so I load these beautiful images and I think...
Beautiful fences..............stupid garbage can.
I apologize for this mood.
Wouldn't it have been nice to tranquilly enjoy these photos without a crazy woman ranting
about kids and a life that has been wonderful to her?
Sakes alive....you best be getting in that Bible.....that's what you need!
It is.....what I need.
I'll be better tomorrow.....I promise.
Okay.....let's say something great here.
Beautiful red barns....blue skies.....
just don't drift and get hit by that 18 wheeler....
That was terrible Lisa!!!
Try again....
Look at the pretty hay.....
all lined up and ready to go......
just like my boys...
waaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!
Oh well....
today is not going to work.
I'll be better tomorrow....
if the Lord's willing and the creek don't rise.
Dear me....
you better leave now.....before some of this mess gets on you....:)
Have a great weekend....
no....I really mean it...:)
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13 comments:
Hang in there! You can do this!
Dearest Lisa,
I sympathize with your torrent of emotions ... I struggle with the same ones every time our "big" boys come home and then go back to their own adult lives.
On another note ... your son is jaw dropping handsome and well educated ... Oh! How I know you are a proud mom.
Blessings,
Mrs.B
This means you did your job well. They grow up and strike out on their own- perfect. Now you have room for new adventures. I used to be resistant to change until I started thinking differently. Yes, I want everything to stay the way it is and never change but when it does, well, you get to experience something else and see what you can do with it. You deserve a bit of time to be sorta sad and you have all your great blogging buddies to listen to you, good or bad. I hope he finds a job real soon!
You need to look at things a bit differently...like the dead tree, it might no longer be alive where you can see it, but it is still strong enough to support other life. Broken limbs come off to make the tree stronger in the really big storms. College kid done with school, but not with life. End of a chapter, but not the book.
What would happen if I threw you into a lake and you didn't move? You would go under, pretty darn quick, so you had better start moving something to stay up. While you're sitting there, you might want to look around for the shore, cause you can only tread water for so long. Keep moving forward. There are better things coming and you would never know their joy if you sit your butt on a stump and hollered about how you don't want to change.
There is one thing I do know. Life changes all the time, with or without you. You can either waste time fighting it or you can embrace all the good things that happen with each new step. And with each new step that takes you away from something, it also brings you closer to something you never knew you couldn't live without. ;) Now get your big girl panties on and turn that page!
Life is all kinds of mixed up things and sure as heck isn't all roses and candy there are days even I wouldn't come near me lol I am such a habitalist that I cant stand change it really puts me out of whack . Hope all gets back to normal soon for you . Lovely photos . Thanks for being real/human and sharing .Have a good weekend !
Oh Lisa...I am so sorry you are having a hard time with this. I have to ditto everything Tete just said. There will be so many more great memories for you to cling to as time goes by. I wish I was there to give you a hug and tell you that everything really will be just fine!
Praying for you to find peace in this new phase of life! Love you, sweet friend!!
It's okay to grieve. I did when my boys moved off....felt like a part of my life was over and they were taking my heart with them....but, honey, it's just beginning! Your boys will be back...hopefully, not like mine where one moved back in and probably will NEVER leave. lol And then they'll meet someone special, get married, and here come the grandkids....and you thought you loved your own kids more than you could ever love anyone! Just wait for that little grandchild! The day they run over and beg you not to go home or to take them with you.....well, it's just pretty darn special. In the meantime, I certainly understand where you are coming from and I give you full permission to grieve....but not too long. We all need your warm smile and wonderful humor!! (ask them if they would like to have "movie night" or something that you have in common once a week....or month....I'll bet they will make time for you! After all, you always made time for them!)
I hear ya loud and clear! My only daughter is all the way across the world, starting her life in my hometown, and I'm here, in her birthplace! How's that for irony?!! I do NOT want to live my life away from her, but for now, I've kept myself as busy as possible, taking on new projects, meeting up with great girlfriends for major gabfests, and doing all the regular domestic diva stuff. Like you said, we bring them up so that they CAN be independent and start their journeys, just like we did. So, during 'Separation Anxiety: Round 2', where this time WE are the ones going through it, realize that God/family/friends/home is our 'classroom'.
Poppy
I've been out of the blogging world for so long that I have missed almost all of your recent posts. I can completely relate to this post. My daughter and her husband moved to California near the Marine base where her husband is stationed. Big sloppy alligator tears for me. They just moved back to Phoenix last night so I am so happy about that. You will get through this my friend!
Ha ha ! I know, I know, not funny, but it is. You sound like me and almost everyone I know. We have so much to be grateful for and we are, but sometimes we get the best of ourselves all riled up and although we KNOW things are good, there is always that STUPID dead tree lurking in the background. Oh well, it will make great firewood later...
We all have our moments. Bounce back my friend. Those boys of yours will always need their momma.
Change is hard.
We like our comfort zones, don't we?!
Hope you are having a better day.
You can get through this!!
K.
I'm laughing as I'm reading this because you always make me laugh. But, there is a deeper part of me crying with you because in 3 days Ted will be getting married and my husband will be changing jobs and everything is changing!
This is life and it's what keeps the adventure going.
Make your boys some food and go visit. Pretty soon you'll get tired of them and be glad to go back to your clean house that isn't messy with socks and stuff.
Blessings my friend :)
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