Showing posts with label family life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family life. Show all posts

Monday, June 20, 2016

Father's Day Fiasco

 
 
 
Hello!
 
I hope everyone enjoyed the Father's Day weekend!
 
My dad's church hosted a father/daughter banquet Saturday and my mom
 
told my sister and I that dad wanted us to go with him....
 
what can you say?
 
So I texted my sister (who lives a state away) and broke the news
 
to her.
 
We laughed about us probably being the oldest daughters there (and we were).
 
We get to the small church and they had decorated it so cute.
 
 
We have arrived!
 
Yes my sister and I are complete opposites...she looks like mom and I look like dad.
 
And you will soon hear that I act like him also.
 
It was a small group of about 20 people and we had a wonderful speaker that also
 
sang a few songs.
 
We were in a small room so the speaker was about 10 feet away from us.
 
I take my phone in to take photos and I put it on mute (I'm not rude ya know).
 
My dad was sitting across the table from my sister and I.
 
He picked up my phone from the table and I'm in a panic because dad and cell phones
 
are a disaster waiting to happen.
 
He looks at the time and whispers/not whispers ( I don't know where he learned to whisper)
 
"is today Friday?"
 
I'm mortified and I'm shaking my head and barely whisper back "no...it's Saturday."
 
Dad whispers/notwhispers.... "I think the car race is on!"
 
I thought we were about to have to get up and take him home but we stayed.
 
As he put my phone back on the table (in this very quiet room),
 
my phone says "I'm sorry, I could not understand what you were asking?"
 
EEEKKK!!!  SIRI!!!!
 
My sister's eyes are screaming at me "DO SOMETHING!!!!"
 
What could I do.....it was done.
 
So we just tried to shrink down and not move for the rest of the night....but no.
 
This little girl was sitting next to us..........adorable!
 
 
And she was perfectly good and quiet until my dad started playing with her,
 
throwing napkins at her until she erupted in giggles and talking to him.
 
Her mom got on to her and I got on to dad.
 
Finally the speaker asked if he could pray before we ate and he asked if fathers and daughters could
 
hold hands.
 
Well my family loves each other dearly but we have never done much holding hands etc
 
so I though it would be nice to capture this rare photo.
 
While my head was bowed I did lift up my camera and tried to guess what angle
 
to hold it and I quickly held the volume button on the side ( I just learned that this will snap
 
a photo on the IPhone) because I didn't want to be rude during the prayer.
 
(barely got my hands in dad's)
 
 
 
But of course something had to go wrong..........
 
my camera went noisily .....clickclickclickclickclickclickclickclick
 
clickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclickclick
 
640 pictures!!!!!!!!!!
 
WHYYYYYY???????
 
Again.....my poor sister is kicking me under the table!
 
I promise y'all I do not intentionally do these things.
 
We eat and win some door prizes....my dad won the visor that is in every photo...
 
my mom is going to kill him....lol. If you look at my first photo dad is also
 
suppose to be wearing a tie...lol.
 
 
It was a great banquet and I apologized to the host and speaker for our noise.
 
Everyone left and of course this Walker crew couldn't do that normally!
 
Somebody locked the keys in the truck!!!!
 
 
 
Don't y'all want us to come to all of your functions?
 
shaking my head..........typical.
 
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
 
Or better
 
 
 
And that concludes our Father's Day fiasco.
 
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Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Black Gold......Redneck Style

 
 
 


(Beverly Hillbillies Theme)
 
 
 
Come and listen to my story
 
'Bout a man named Shannon
 
A sweet redneck man
 
wondering why his wife is fannin'
 
 
they rode one day
 
and was cruisin' with his nets
 
and up through the ground came a bubblin' reds
 
crawdads that is, freshwater lobsters.



 
Well first thing you know ol Shannon's here and there
 
he says to his wife "pick your feet up" and she glared
 
 
 
she said Redneck Island is the place I want to be
 
get me out of this mud, I'm gettin' hun-ger-y
 
KFC, chicken that is..yum..yum
 
 
 Now it's time to say goodbye to Shannon and his kin
 
and they would like to thank you folks fer kindly dropping in
 
 
Your all invited back next week to this locality
 
to have a heapin' help of their hospitality
 
 
Redneck, that is,,,
 
set a spell...take your shoes off
 
 
 
 
Y'all come back now y'here?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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Sunday, April 10, 2016

The Good Wife

 
 
So you know you're from the South when:

I'm lying in bed last night and I feel something on the back of my arm.
 
  I'm thinking "uggg....is that a tick?"
 
 So I grab it and pull and "pop" it comes off. I turn on my bedside lamp and it is not a tick......
 
it is something worse...........a skin tag.
 
  I feel the back of my arm and I'm bleeding like a stuck pig...frown emoticon
 
  Then I hear Shannon say....what's wrong....why is your arm bleeding?
 
  Panic mode sets in. Should I say a tick????
 
 No...that's nasty......a skin tag....no that means his wife is old....think.........think.... umm......
 
YOU scratched it!!
 
  He says...oh...I'm so sorry.
 
 Whew.......problem solved.....just make the hubby feel guilty........don't judge...
 
I did this FOR him.
 
I'm a good wife like that...:)


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Monday, December 21, 2015

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

 
 
 YOU KNOW....
 
 
DASHER
 
 
AND DANCER

 
AND PRANCER

 
AND VIXEN

 
COMET

 
AND CUPID

 
DONNER

 
AND BLITZEN

 
AND OF COURSE...RUDOLPH


 
AND RANDOLPH?!!!
 

 
 
AND GANDOLPH?!!
 
 
 
 
AND JINGLE?!!
 
 
AND BELL?!!
 
 
AND SANTA!!!!!!!
 
 
 
YES MY FRIENDS.....MY SWEET DOG HAD 14 PUPPIES!!!!!!!
 
That's not really going to be their names...lol....but 14!!!!!!
 
Can you believe it?!
 
She's such a good mommy!
 
 
The puppies are adorable and all seem healthy and so is mommy.
 

 
I was a little down this Christmas and God always knows just what to do.
 
You can't be down and out with this many little blessings.
 


I am trying to help her feed them though.......they are growing so fast and stay hungry!!

 
I love to see them sleeping so peacefully, with their tongues hanging out and full little bellies.
 
They are one week old today.
 
They were born on December 14.....hmmmm.. 14..coincidence?
 
 
Breesy is the best little mommy....she has been precious with them.
 

 
Believe it or not we have so many people that want them we had to make
a backup list....in case someone doesn't want theirs,  there is someone to take their place.
 

 
The problem is...........I'm already attached......too attached.
 
And I have decided..............................
 
 
I want to keep them ALL!!!!!
 
OH SHANNON!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
 
PRETTY PLEASE????!!!!



Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Once Upon A Time....


 
 
 
there was a magical kingdom with a grumpy
prince and a beautiful, slightly overweight princess.
 
 
 
One day the grumpy Prince declared "there will be no
more chickens in the kingdom!"
 
 

The Princess huffed and she puffed and she thought about

lowering her long beautiful hair out the window and leaving but
she forgot that she doesn't look good in long hair and she has short hair now so she just stormed out the front door. 
 
Then she thought about an evil plan of poisoning apples but she
had already used them all making yummy caramel apples.
 
 
She just knew evil stepsisters would know what to do but she doesn't have any so she went to her friends Sleepy, Dopey, and Doc  and got advice.
 

Sleepy said "push him off a wall and let him have a great fall!"

and Dopey said "I know a beanstalk in the woods and if he climbs it we could cut it down" and Doc said "just move...I know a beautiful house made out of candy."
 
 


 




Well the house made of candy was sorely tempting to the Princess but she loved the grumpy Prince.
 
So she just fell into a deep deep sleep each night and took the vow of silence during the day until the Prince slayed the dragon of grumpiness, kissed the Princess and granted her all of her wishes.



 
 

Many chickens will be added to the kingdom

and they lived happily

ever after.........
 
 
 

 
The End
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Wednesday, July 1, 2015

Love and a Root Canal....

 
 
What do you do after you've been married 31 years???

 One goes to work and the other one gets a root canal. Hope the next 31 are just as exciting...
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
So after I get back from the dentist the conversation goes like this.

 Shannon : I know you don't feel like going somewhere tonight but I will make it up to you and we will go somewhere real soon. I love you.
 

 Me: Awww...if my wipsh wash not numb I would kish you.....I wufsh you too. Oopsh....sorry I swobbered on yoush arm.
 
 
 
(later that night)
 
Now this is how you celebrate...11:00 ice cream
 
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